My New Ground Breaking Practice
So I did a “thing” last week. KSN came to my farm to do a story on me. I was really proud of myself for being so brave to share my story, but more than that, this is the “thing” that I was most proud of. The day before my interview with the local news station, I talked with my family and told them that I would need some things in place. I am learning that after I talk about or spend time processing my past trauma, I am emotionally and mentally spent. In the past when I was struggling I would just try and shove it down and tend to “all the things” and everyone’s needs even though I was screaming inside. This never ended well. By bedtime, I would be frustrated, hurt, and angry that I always have to carry the whole damn world. Turns out, I don’t have to carry the whole damn world; I just thought I had to.
So this time, I planned ahead. With help from my family, I cleared my afternoon schedule so that I could spend the rest of the day after my interview doing whatever I wanted or needed to. Nate took the girls to work and Jaden cooked dinner. It was amazing. It gave me time to process. I ended up spending time with each of my 3 horses. No rushing. No time limit. No pressing schedule. No one to tend to but me. It was healing to let myself soak in the quiet goodness I feel when I am with my equines. When evening time came and all my people were home, instead of feeling exhausted and frustrated, I felt grounded and peaceful.
You guys! This is life-changing! Monumental! Who knew that intentional self-care could actually make me feel cared for? Wow! From now on, this is my new way to live. I will put in the effort to plan ahead for my health. I will prioritize my well-being because when I do, not only am I happier, my whole world is happier. Let’s face it, people. When mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy. ;)
It is incredibly empowering learning how to care for myself. It is still hard for me to permit myself, but the more I do it, the more I experience the beautiful benefits. Each of us is unique. There is no secret, one-size-fits-all recipe for self-care. We have to explore to find the things that are helpful to us when we are struggling. Each of us has different needs. This might be obvious to you but I often find myself feeling guilty for the things I need. For some reason, I feel bad that the very best way for me to find peace is to be alone. Maybe because I grew up in a community that was all about unity and being together. It feels selfish. I don’t know. Whatever the reason, it’s been hard for me to embrace this truth about myself. I need alone time. I need space and time to let myself recharge and heal. When I am with people, I always focus on them and their needs, so it’s essential that I set aside time to focus on me. It’s not only okay, it’s essential.
I want to encourage each of you this week to ask yourself this question: “What things do I need to do to care for myself?” You may not know the answer right away, but no worries my friend. I promise if you can be brave enough to explore, you will find what brings you peace. Once you learn yourself better, you can begin to implement these things into your daily life.
*Important Warning* - taking action to get your needs met could quite possibly make you feel powerful, happier, and healthier. So if you enjoy living in misery I strongly suggest you disregard this post. ;)
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